Thursday, March 27, 2014

Its Day 3 of a New Me

I had a "moment" the other day. I guess it hit me kind of all at once that things will be changing drastically around here in a few months. I don't usually dwell on it too often. I'm a busy stay at home mom with kids and a job, but the other day when I received my first bill from the hospital... well it became a little more real to me in a different way. My life is about to change and it's going to affect my family and all those close to me. But after I picked myself up out of dwelling on the messy part, I realized that though there are things I do not have control over (all the what if's), there are things that I could be doing now to prepare and help this experience be as positive as possible. I need to be proactive. It won't do me any good to avoid thinking about it completely or to sit around worrying about it. What could I do?

I was browsing through instagram one night and stumbled across @jennaskitchen. I was inspired! So I decided to look into the "Whole30" thing and had an "aha!" moment. I'm a dance teacher and very active, BUT I really don't ever bother with caring about what I do or do not eat. I love ALL kinds of food. I'm not a picky eater and love to try new things... healthy or bad. But the thought of trying to purify my body from the inside out as much as possible was not something I'd ever consider spending 30 days doing. Until now that is. I guess I realized that if I want this upcoming surgery to be a success, I should probably start caring about my health in a new way. I'm sure it would help my recovery a whole lot which is so crucial for me. This is my motivation behind doing Whole30. I want to be the best mommy I can be and I want to be around for a long time. I mean, that's the whole reason I'm even having this surgery to begin with! To stay alive and healthy as long as I can. It only  makes sense that I should be doing that on a daily basis... caring about my health and being a little more aware of what I'm eating.

If you don't know me, I'll be undergoing a prophylactic double mastectomy in the beginning of July. This was a very hard decision for me and my family, but at the end of the day, its what the Lord has given us faith for and what we feel is the right decision. I tested BRCA2 positive in October of last year right after my mom found out she was BRCA2 positive. This means genetically, we are at high risk for breast cancer. We also have a history of breast cancer in the family so my mom (who's 50) underwent a prophylactic double mastectomy in November right after losing her dad to cancer. We've gotten a huge reality check recently. You can be young and healthy one minute, and then get cancer out of nowhere and all that health is gone in a heartbeat. Its a long road of recovery, but in the end, I'll be GREATLY reducing my risk of breast cancer! I will no longer be at high risk, but the normal risk of 5% like everyone else. I don't want to burden my family with a big surgery along with the cost and time that will be involved, but thinking about staying at high risk for BC and the potential of my family watching me suffer through that, is obviously the bigger concern. Its an emotional roller coaster, but its been helpful to watch my mom go before me. She's an amazingly strong woman. There's too much to share honestly but that is the general. I'm going to get healthy now. As healthy as possible for my kids, for my husband, and for me, because I only get one body and want to be a good steward of it.

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